It's times like these...

For those who have tried to raise a sick and dying puppy I'm fairly sure you'd understand how I feel at the moment.

It bothers me that there are people in my family (myself included) who aren't people that are reliable when it comes to socializing, be it making friends, keeping friends or socialization that is required to stay alive and connected in this day in age i.e. job searching, people management and PR. It bothers me even more when I extend a hand out to those in hopes of bringing them at least to my level and beyond, kinda like the belief where people can improve on things if they worked together, such as pointing out faults in each other and working ways to improve each other through well... connection. I love my mother... very dearly. In fact she's one of the few that I'm willing to put everything on the line for in a heartbeat. So much that 20 years of growing under negative enforcement, abuse be it physical or mental and the fact that she plays a big part in our family being a bit screwed up has not phased my love for her. I'm only writing this cause it hurts seeing someone like her headed toward a dead end and all efforts I have made have been for naught. Mind you it's one of the only things that have hurt me to the point of tears, and consideration of seeking help from a professional.

To break things down simply, my mother shows no potential of being able to live on her own without financial help from anyone. For a few years I've realized this and I've been trying to inch my way to changing her should there be a case of divorce or death (bless my dad's soul). And much like trying to polish a piece of shit, it still doesn't shine. I feel like quite the retard too... still continuously trying to polish that shit to make it shine even though something in the back of my head is screaming at me to stop and focus on more worthwhile things in life.

Life isn't any easier when you're being tricked out of your own money by people and you're broke. And with the advent of midterms in the coming weeks, as well as problems with friends as well as the itching sense loneliness looming over your shoulder, things just pile up to make that burden on your back even heavier as it was before.

Simply put... I'm posting this because I just broke down earlier, I'm guessing it's one of those cases with the straw on the camel's back or something. I'm also posting this because people have told me that writing things down will make you feel better. People have also told me that telling other people about problems in life makes you feel better. So far, it's working.

It's times like these that get me to listen to music for hours on end though... guess it's a good time to pop in a pile of random music for study eh? Emotional rushes like these help artists create art as well, so maybe this might prove helpful to me.

In any case, I'm still putting in a good deal of time I have to practicing on the tables and mixing... hopefully I'll be able to shovel something out onto here soon!

祭り始まるぞぉぉ！

I have just been able to complete my DJ set a few days back so I will be able to work everything soon!
I'll also be able to get this blog running once I get enough practice to start mixing and scratching.
I have pictures of my entire set. It consists of two turntables, a set of time-coded vinyls, a connectiv interface for the computer, a mixer with fx options, my laptop and my tv for speakers.

Technical Difficulties

It seems there has been many problems arising with my new set.
I lost the pictures and have become too lazy to take it again and Yea..........
...............
Apparently my setup doesn't work on the computer. This doesn't bode well with me.
On a lighter note, my uncle has offered to sell me his old digital set for a very low price. So either way I will start mixing somehow.
..................
Also.... I've gotten back to playing mahjong...
...Yes... that is my excuse.

嬉しいような悲しいような。。。

I know I promised pictures of my full set weeks ago but I've been procrastinating. Seems blogwork just registers as just another chore I love to procrastinate on. Either way, many things have been on my mind to keep my mind off of the blog for quite a while. While finding a job has proved to be a prospect in my life that is becoming less and less possible as I send in resumes to sell myself to companies, the living and monetary situations are continually becoming a bigger burden in life. A lot of shit has happened since the end of AX and it's kept me quite down for a long time. Thing is though... everything that I've had to swallow has only brought me another step closer to investing whats left of my energy to things that actually get me somewhere in life. I'll be posting whats left of my pictures as well as random stuff with the rest of my post once I pry my laptop away from my father.

Doki Doki Matsuri and Mixes

I have just returned home to find that my synthesizer has just been sent along with two CD mixers for light performance mixing and to use as a background beat. I'll put pictures up later... since it's four in the morning.

Burebure Matsuri and Turns

It's been a while since I updated my blog and I did promise that I would have pictures of my turntables by the next time, but I have a good reason why I haven't been updating. I've gone to AX (Anime Expo for those of you who don't know) and spent four days there spending my money buying useless crap for my own enjoyment. I'd call it retail therapy in my own little way. There were many good cosplayers there, and as a fellow cosplayer myself, I felt it was pretty weird being the one behind the camera, which explains the lack of pictures I have with me. Though I did take pictures of the costumes I thought were well made or that the person wearing it looked nice in it. What surprised me this year were the amount of Team Fortress 2 cosplay, though most of them were fairly simple and easy to make, I was glad there were people (some girls) that were fans of the game. (Posts of the girl TF2 cosplayers coming soon!.. after I can get photobucket running correctly again)








My turntables have finally arrived as well!.. Well it was about two weeks ago but still! It's incomplete as of the moment. I need speakers, timecode vinyls and a synthesizer to start working on the music projects. My first project will be of Mizuumi irc channel's Satsu: The Movie. I hope people will give me requests to mix other things as well, it would be really fun.
I should be able to start mixing really soon. My uncle seems to have purchased a new set and might possibly give me his old ones so I can be able to start soon. (I can't go out and buy myself one either since I have went back to being dirt poor after AX)

Soon to start!

I have just come back from San Jose with a set of turntables. I just need to save up to purchase a synthesizer and a set of good speakers and I should be set to start mixing.
I'll post up the pictures of the turntables soon.

It's Almost Over~

Just finished turning in the largest and last essay of teh semester for english. I have a Japanese final to go. No decks and turntables yet, but once summer comes I'll be able to get them.
Won't be too long till I start mixing and putting them up on this site.

Dunno why...

I decided to start a blog today, I really don't understand why I wanted to do it but yea... It's started. Guess I'll start posting more stuff about my boring ass life and possibly rage/emo about it accordingly. Either way though, since it's already been started I might as well post something about today.

A friend of mine dropped a shitload of music on me the other day and I decided to scrape through it in between breaks of essay writing and gameplay. I noticed Korean music isn't that bad at all, especially the DJ beats and shit. xD
Now that I mention it, I guess the reason for me to start up the blog would be for the music I'll be making later when I actually start mixing for reelz. But at this moment I'm just waiting for my decks to come in and to find a way to get my hands a copy of a computerized mixer.

Guess I won't be blogging much until something new comes up or I actually get everything set up. Oh and Yum picture.


The layout of Konata's room is fairly close to mine actually... with the desktop being replaced by the laptop.

そしてこのブローグに日本語をつかいますが。。。
ぼくはれんしゅうしてだけです。

-Ukki